4:30am and 27.8 degrees C and I’ve been awake for 45 minutes. I’m not sure why I woke up; I think the fan blowing on me gave me a slight chill and 4am is that prime wake-up time for me. Maybe I’m a bit nervous too. So here we are. Writing on an iPhone in hopes I’ll fall back asleep before my 6:30 alarm to take me to the airport.
In just a few hours I’ll be on a plane, saying goodbye to #Adventure2012(/13). I can’t believe how quickly it’s all gone, and how mixed I feel about everything. In just a few hours I’ll trade in 27.8 for -27.8 and be shivering in a bed in Ottawa, my mom sleeping peacefully for the first time since my initial departure. I can’t believe it’s over.
So. A big thank you:
To my readers, thank you. Your constant encouragement was what kept me writing (even when it wasn’t very good) and got me to explore a side of myself I had always wanted to. I’m looking forward to seeing what this space transforms into in the next few months, and hope you’ll stick around. Thank you.
To my new friends, thank you. You might not have known it, but you saw me at my best and my worst, my highest and lowest, and you changed me into this cool chick I had been trying to find for years. Thank you.
To my old friends I caught up with over here, thank you. You have spoiled me beyond belief, treated me like a queen, were so helpful and so loving…and holy shit have we had a blast. My trip, my life, would have been very different without you, and I am forever grateful and in your debt. I can’t wait to see you again somewhere in the world. I love you. Thank you.
To my friends and family back home, thank you. Your support and encouragement from far away places made my heart swell and, even though I felt alone at times, I knew you were just a message away. It’s been a pleasure getting little notes of love (and a pleasure making you jealous!) and I know I’m going home to the most loving circle a woman could surround herself with. For everything you’ve done for me, both during this trip and before and for however long we’ve known each other, thank you.
A friend asked me the other night if I had gotten everything out of this trip I hoped to achieve, and, after thinking about it for a minute, I answered yes.
This trip came about because I was tired. I was tired of my job. Tired of depression. Tired of heartache. Tired of whatever slump I had gotten myself into and not let myself out of. I had had enough and all at once quit my job – my life – and five weeks later was in Melbourne with hardly any money or a plan. I didn’t know what I wanted to achieve aside from “change everything”…
…and I did. Was it drastic to jump ship and head to the other side of the world to change things? Yes. Fuck yes. But I learnt (on this trip!) that I need to do things the hard way to make any kind of change in my life; eat an entire bag of Oreos, have the phone company turn me off, break down crying for 12 hours straight until I’m throwing up and dehydrated…impatient and impulsive Jenny needs to hit rock rock rock bottom and learn lessons the hard way. I wish I wasn’t like that, but I am.
So I had hoped to “change everything”, and I have. I found Jenny. I found old Jenny and mixed her in with new Jenny to form some sort of UltraJenny. I’m coming home stronger, smarter, sillier and happier. I changed everything. Mission accomplished.
Cheesy? Of course. I’m fucking mayor of cheesytown. But it’s true.
In a few hours I’ll be waiting at the airport to start my long journey home, and when I get off the plane I’ll start this new, awesome, hella-tanned life I discovered I wanted. I’m very sad my trip is ending, of course, but I’m very excited for what’s to come, and very thankful to everyone who, one way or another, have gotten me to this point. We all rock, guys.
See you soon, Canada.